“I applied for a mortgage today, my wife and I finally decided to settle outside of Cincinnati now that Ive retired… but the Pentagon denied my mortgage application,” James Swank, of Cincinnati, Ohio told the NevYork Times today, in a story about the recent merger of the Pentagon with two of the nations top three [...]
Robert Anton Wilson died yesterday. Famed author of The Illuminati Trilogy, aka the Illuminatus! trilogy, and Master of the Multiple Deaths, RAW sent a final Email to the Universe in which he stated an unstatable proposition in funeral tones, which the Universe promptly took him up on. Meanwhile, mere mortals wait Earthbound for their own [...]
Several groups of scientists recently claimed that the Apocalypse is merely a relative term, causing many religious organizations to immediately respond with threats to call down the Wrath of God upon them. “The apocalypse is one thing for humans, another entirely for cockroaches,” said Meyer L. Hymie of the organization Scientific Scientists for Science. “One [...]
The Oil Apocalypse, as referred to by many Exchange Traded Fund analysts, showed new signs of threatening Global Warming trends in the energy sector on Wednesday. “The Oil Apocalypse, with the situation in Africa right now, could easily slide back up to $80 this summer. Geo-political instability could combine with actual the hottest year on [...]
